Define "chronic" masturbator.
You know im sick of people that are still obsessed w obama. that was sooooo last year
so I just used the H1N1 mask my mom gave me for college to hold in a bong hit longer... god I love orientation week
Fact: The drinking you do in college doesn't affect your liver in real life.
My mom asked me if I was being satisfied, sexually. And then discussed positioning.
It was odd. His friends dick tasted the same as his. Friends are beginning to have to much in common
my heart is telling me chinese, but my head is telling me beer.
Clearly my hormones are sending beaming lights to every penis in the area
I left my pipe in my center console with a bowl packed when I took my car to the shop, and when I picked it up the weed had been smoked, but my oil change was only half price.
There's still helium in the tank I found in the garbage outside the bar!
Nothing like coming home and finding the nearly full bottle of fireball you forgot you had stashed before your trip
It's the little things
we were running around the halls trying to bloodhound search out the source of the weed smell, but we ran into six other people doing the same thing, and they all said they assumed it was us.
Woke up naked with a post-it that said "don't ask questions" on my ass...i know im not supposed to ask but uhm what did I do?
woke up to find a case of beer in the oven and a random puppy in the house...guess i had a party last night?
I just woke up and I don't really remember anything past 1pm. How much am I missing?
A good 10-11 hours. You got laid twice. Also, you out-ran a cop and played football with a lamp.
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