After he finished I threw up my arms and shouted STEVE HOLT!
Spotted: Pepto Bismol pink Scion with Ed Hardy sticker on front window, air freshener, and seat covers. Total Douchette Mobile.
this is amzing! feels like my body is having sex with its surroundings!
I'm pretty sure he came before I knew he was inside me.. Didn't think that was his plan when he said he was gonna do things I've never experienced before
It had been so long since my last time that it was easily a double helping of stomach pancakes. I think she was mildly impressed.
His bookmark is a piece of toilet paper. No shame there.
I just did a sobriety test in a tutu.
I just looked at your pics on Facebook....there was cake? Where the fuck was I!?
Have you ever come so hard that right after you have the urge to yell "make me a sandwich!"? ...I think my ovaries turned into testicles.
You had sex with him AND his man bun. Like not just him but also the bun.
Just got invited to a tree party by some random chicks. They're literally just sitting up in a tree with a handle of rum and a box of goldfish crackers and yelled at me as I was walking by...
Dude, I just feel great. I love life so much and I love you. Love. Love. So much love.
I dont need your sympathy!!!! Just a fifth of vodka and gummy bears...lots and lots of gummy bears to take my agression out on.
I am certain that you would be a mere freckle on the behemoth of slutty that has taken place at this complex.
My one night stand from last weekend is now taking me on a date this weekend. How is this my life?
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