we went to a bar last night, drank beer in plastic cups. I took pics w/a random kid i pulled into a photobooth & i have easy mac in my purse. I belong here.
Only in Alabama do they play hymns in a bar!!!
Normal people don't sit around and watch Degrassi for twelve hours...
FUCK YOU.
okay, prove you're not drunk to me. write 5 true sentences about me with correct grammar.
I am sober. Because I don't drunk. It is bad. People die. I like Domenico because o he bag women what up?
I know this may seem inappropriate, but are you gonna bring any blow to the wedding?
i realized really quickly that drinking a bottle of vodka and 3 crystal light packets wasn't the best idea i've ever had
whatever a "slut portfolio" is, mine is apparently almost complete
I am literally using a balloon as a pillow on a park bench.
Like what kind of adult things? Whats more adult than drinking at 2pm on a monday?
I was too sleepy and drunk to verbally annihilate anyone and ruin their reason for being. So i just opted to sleep with the fitted sheet on the floor
N.C. cops just used a megaphone to tell me I have a slutty outfit. My life is complete.
Wake up we need to beat the walk of shame rush hour
I did something similar high once. I stopped like 30 feet in front of a stop sign because I felt like it was running towards me and I started crying. Got out my car and hugged it and told it not to run away people need it.
I figured it out! The supermoon explains how I managed to have sex with 3 dudes in 3 nights without leaving the apartment.
Protip if he licks the back of your knee and you reflexively kick him your game of 'lick the lady' is over.
Randomize
