Don't bone anyone, just think of ur vibrator lol
HHaaaaaaaaa mmmmn vibrator
He told me I remind him of his sister...
Was this before or after you did it?
before... I mean, it's been a long time. I just tried not to think of it during.
haha you were so trashed that you deleted all of your christian music from itunes and kept saying"c-ya God, nice knowin ya"
my quiz for the book was only 2 questions and my one answer was sorry and then a sad face
it was such a weird mix, KFC and penis
This year I'm going to try NOT getting arrested. I think the 30th birthday is the cutoff for calling Mom to bail me out.
I think he just made me trade sex for my cat.
I bet it kind of sucks while you do community service I'm getting blown in the shower. haha
She pulled vodka outta the dryer and told me to drink it
I used my yoga mat as a door stop so he couldn't come into my room when i was sleeping last night. Drunk engineering at its finest
It was just a Craigslist hook up but she wore sweats. Where are the girls with class?
My dream date: Hotdogs/nachos from the bar & tequila. Is that too much to ask?
I should be trashily making out with an air force cadet in the beach volleyball court by now
I just left a 3 minute voicemail to the guy I want to fuck baby talking my cats and I don't know if I can delete it 😐
I learned tonight while in another country that no matter the nationality, men are disappointing in bed
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