You know, sometimes I seriously doubt your commitment to sparkle motion.
Nope it's a specific set of cards not like a normal ace, queen king thing....kinda like UNO, but instead of yelling UNO you get shitfaced
Ur just texting me random shit. That's what Twitter is for
I don't know. I guess at the end of the day I wanted taco bell more than a boyfriend.
Totally get that.
Either call me back or tell me you're in jail. For fucks sake. If this is a cop, just help out. national league.
I feel like jumping into a breast pit right now. Like the old school ball pits at mcdonalds.
High with mom again. She's giving me relationship advice.
Also I feel that I would be a hell of a sled dog operator.
I have this terrible fear I might accidentally text a pic of my dick to my grandma
It's not ok to announce to a group of people playing beer pong that a girl put her finger in your butt last night. I now know this
Spent 20mins wondering why my roommate wouldn't answer after we were pounding on the door.....Def went to the wrong building.
On the way home there was a guy passed out IN the road on Colfax with his pants around his ankles, completely bare assed. If he was dressed as a speed bump, he succeeded.
That broad from the bar put her name in my phone as "The girl I'm going to marry in 10 years".
just discovered a semi frightening wound on the side of my head that must have happened last night. if i die of a brain aneurysm, make sure they put "sorry for partying" on my gravestone.
Does the girl you just banged want anything from Taco Bell?
Randomize