they need to just BURY HIM!
imagine if we didn have a dick. we would be so much more productive
i promise ill be ok...btw im only considered "not ok" if i end up in the hospital.
She Kept going around and squirting jello shots into guys mouths. That was her ice breaker.
I'll have you know that I'm still picking duct tape residue off my wrist from sunday
i was gonna do a lot worse than just throw cat food on you while you were passed out, but then you sleep vomited and i felt a little bad
You need to fuck him. The man has his own Wikipedia.
He wants me to hook up with his fiance while he watches. Text you later with how it goes.
We are going to the humane society and getting you microchipped so you don't get lost on your birthday. Either that or your getting a child leash
Got a text that the fed tax return dropped into my account just before getting on the first leg of my flights the Vegas. Fate? Viva Las Vegas!
Why are there jello shots in the kitchen drawer?
I will 100% jerk off using my own tears as lube before I'd ever bang a 4.
I have two choices: tits or tacos. I just can't decide.
Theres about 23 grilled cheese sandwiches stuck to my ceiling and tomato soup all over the kitchen. You are never allowed over again. Ever.
i’n just gonna forge ahead, gag reflex be DAMNED.
Randomize
