it wouldnt have been so bad but she still had the cowboy hat on when my mom walked in
It was annoying to wait 4 hour for him to be inside for 5 seconds.
theres gunna be a new season of 16 and pregnant on mtv...WHERE DO THEY KEEP FINDING THESE IGNORANT PREGNANT GIRLS
I was working er so they smashed a vodka bottle over dan's head so they'd have an excuse to visit
i secretly love the power trip of being their RA & busting these idiots for everything i did as a freshman
Yep we found him face down in my sister's bathroom begging for blowjobs without mustard
The doctor told me if I woke up with a broken foot and don't know how it happened, I might want to look into getting treatment.
Like her Facebook page isn't even hers. It belongs to her tits. It's Titsbook
yes and no. im drunk but idk if im "blow marcus" drunk. call in like an hour.
Please come quick there are people in suits here judging me
Neither a grow-er nor a show-er. More like a no-er. If he didn't have testicles, I'm not sure you could tell he was a male, even standing there naked. There will be no second date.
I just hit your bf in the face with a mustard bottle and the guy at the table next to us bowed down to me.
So far I consider it a great summer because I have had to buy Plan B a total of zero times
In my defense I didn't know there was concrete on the other side of that fence when I tossed him over it.
You're both fucking idiots and this is why I should never let you two drink alone.
Oh. My. God. I. Am. Going. To. Punch. Someone. In. The. Face. Immediately.
Randomize
