it hasn't hit me that college is over yet. so far at home, i haven't brushed my teeth, taken off my makeup, or changed clothes before bed.
So my Christmas cards this year will be my mug shot with my kids face photo shopped next to me....too ghetto?
the party we crashed was not a party. the party we crashed was jens grandads funeral.
No, don't worry. We're not going to get THAT arrested.
I just dont think you can meet a stranger after youve heard them cum through the walls though
At one point, you closed your eyes and asked me which 'six flags' we were at
I promised myself in the hospital that I would give up drinking for however long the cast stayed on. Thank god it was only soft tissue and not a fracture.
And there was a legally blind kid in a ref costume doing surprisingly well at beer pong who was passing out business cards
there's an entire drinking game devoted to nobody liking her face
So a guy died and our dates revived him with CPR. Good night?
Thanks for bringing me tea/a bucket. You have earned yourself a face touch.
I fully support your bad decision but I do not approve of your unironic use of the word yolo
She looked so much better when u didn't look at her and the music was too loud to hear her
Your dick is the only reason I have motivation to come back to school today
I can't be sure but I think I slept with a clown last night...
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