You hook up with other guys, let him talk to other girls.
no
I just saw the girl you left with - Chris Hansen's looking for you
i woke up this morning in my bathroom,naked, with my boxers around my face and puke and shit on the floor and wondering why i didn't have a toenail on my one big toe.
compared to you, a hobo is quite responsible.
i have a real life question, do ur boyfriends pretend to be vampires ever?
What kind of flower means "I want to have unprotected sex with you, preferably from behind?" because thats the message I'd really like to send on Valentines Day
You're so wise. You're like my sexual Grandmother Willow.
Well she just peed in a pot and is now trying to boil it
I can now tell my grandchildren Central Park has really great spots for quickies...
You face planted into a car door. And somehow didn't drop your burrito.
we probably should not get naked in my neighbor's garage again. just sayin
He's moaning and crying and coughing up something audibly liquid. I can't live in this house any more.
I keep jumping up and down in front of the mirror naked. The only motivation I would be to stop and put clothes on is if you come over. Hurry.
I feel like we have both made good decisions regarding our vaginas lately
Company sent me first class out of state, got so drunk on the plane I started handing out pillows and blankets to the people in coach
I just watched my high school guidance counselor pee in the backyard of this party.
Randomize
