Does leaving at 3 give Sara enough time to take the bus or are you picking her up?
I cant tell if your joking or not, but I'm picking her up
Do you need some kind of permission slip from her parents or can anyone just go and grab a high schooler these days?
Watching this movie and saying "drink every time you see an animal" was a bad idea...circle of life...holy crap
do guys with small dicks even attempt to pursue romantic relationships?
there's a wings menu taped to my wall. don't tell me i don't have my priorities straight.
Only way we know if he truly fits in is if we spill straight vodka on the floor and his first instinctnis to lick it up. Otherwise, gameover.
does the girl puking in my garbage belong to you?
Is there a non-awkward way to tell a girl I work with that she looks just like my favourite pornstar?
Never have i felt more judged than when i was throwing up in front of a hello kitty shower curtain at 5 in the morn
Nothing says "class act" like eating acid in the middle of a Buffalo Wild Wings
MY BUTT IS BIG ENOUGH FOR AN ANACONDA AND HE DOESNT GET TO ENJOY IT TOUGH SHIT
I didn't realize how much I relied on you for a reason to drink on tuesday
I described my life as a 7 layer cake of death
Just learned that the cute guy I've been flirting with at the beach this whole time is actually an inmate working in the community instead of being in prison.. My life is unreal
The last thing I remember is trying to chug the rest of the everclear, running through a fence, and laying down in the snow. I hurt.
It's like Guy Diamond blew glitter into my vagina.
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