I DON'T KNOW WHERE WE ARE WE ARE TOO FUCKING ELEVATED.
Me either! Fuck yeah, 12th and something. 12th and hamburger stand.
Sometimes your consistent use of proper punctuation makes me nervous D:
I'm drinking early times at a fridays on wednesday night. This entire bar is going to see my dick by last call.
i made it my goal to pee in the sink of every apartment we went to last night. i didnt use the toilet once
He said he wanted to see my room, not my womb. It's a common mistake.
Missed another period
I almost hope you're pregnant, this is unfair.
Update: still drunk enough to get lost in Zellers and to think my reflection was my mother. Awesome day.
Its 6 am and me and the girl in the next apartment have been taking turns puking and yelling "never agaaaain" thru the walls.
Call me when you get back form court. Hopefully its not later than noon. Just remember..win or lose we still booze.
I didn't ride the struggle bus so much as drive it backwards off a cliff.
Dad was on the deck drinking straight bourbon. He stopped, puked on his feet, and then continued drinking and talking about compound interest.
I'm crying and shaving my Bronco playoff beard
Geez don't go to a bar for a few days and everyone freaks out.
And my cousin was so drunk he called an uber and instead he got into a cop car and they took him to the hospital
I found my bra I wore on Friday night...he fucked the underwire out of it
hahahahaha
Randomize
