nothing as in nothinggggg kills the mood for me is when a girl with 4 cm nipple hair
Just remembered throwing your phone at your face in a half-drunk stupor the other morning when your alarm went off. Thought I should apologize.
if i wake up one more time on my porch im gonna start considering myself homeless
She's a Laker fan, her sister is a Celtic fan... no matter who wins I'm getting a celebration bj from one of them!
We probably shouldn't have forced that guys cat to drink the grey goose while we were doing lines in his bathroom
Someone just got kicked out of the mall for being dressed like a giant cat. I feel like this is in your future.
Just bought the plane tickets. Light headed. Blood rush to clit oh god blue clit. Mayday mayday vagina down!
No, no. The rest of his everything inspires me to put his dick in my mouth
Thank you for not puking on my lap during the first class of the semester. And fuck you for doing it in the second.
woke up next to the new dishwasher. set the record for banging a new employee to 6 hours...i should be a professional sexual predator
Hey, I'm just seeing how you're doing and letting you know I fucked your dad last night. Don't fuck with me.
And two different second-graders said my make up was pretty. It's left over from last night bc I woke up 5 min before I was supposed to leave.
I think I gotta smoke less weed, I'm getting to lazy to fuck my girlfriend
What, That's like a total 7 inches of cock and 6 are from Joe. Don't be mad at me because you had the lamest orgy ever.
Crop dusting thru forever 21
Randomize
