Goddamnit I hate your level headedness
Good. I was naked most of the night. But sometimes I would wear my tux vest...But only my tux vest. It was classy
I swear to god Kristen, if this "cute" guy you are trying to hook up with's friend asks me if we can role play, and I play his mother one more time, Im leaving. You have 3 minutes to save me or I am out.
peeing in bathroom at penn station and the homeless man next to me is combing his beard with a fork...god I love new york
My cat gives me a boner
I bought my dad an absinthe brewing kit for christmas.. looks like tripping with my dad is in my near future.
when she asked me if it was possible to swim under north america i knew it was time to leave.
He passed out so we kept throwing water on him, he got excited and asked if we were at the wave pool.
The bartender gave me the kids toys. Paddle ball & a gecko.
We forgot to go back and get the brick YOU WANTED TO BRING INTO THE BAR?
I remember trying to cut the power to a house I thought was "too bright to understand the meaning of christmas". Pretty sure I blacked out down the street.
The only pictures I have are of me being stoned or me looking like a man, which do you prefer?
I yelled out look at all those hickeys. And then gave her boyfriend a high five
The bag I'm bringing home for the weekend: a change of clothes, workout shoes, and sex toys, that's it.
I don't have any plans for New Year's except watching anime and drinking until I can't read the subtitles anymore.
Randomize