ok 1 i realized people actually live in central wisconsin and 2 culvers could be a good place to pick up chicks today
if I'm ever single again, I swear to god I'm going to have 87 venerial diseases
Do you remember when I jumped into your arms and you farted?
Just went to my life planning class. The professor has a braid going halfway down his back and an earring.
Drunk tip #47: Its better to overestimate how many plastic bottles itll take to urinate in, rather then underestimate.
it's not like i was drunk to the point of NEEDING help...i just wanted someone to offer to hold my hair or something.
Exactly. So you're exempt under the "I can't just fuck her to make it go away" clause of 2010.
This conversation has now reached a level of awkward that even a passerby streaking hobo couldn't break.
I mean, you got a giant dick. I've seen lawn gnomes that are smaller.
Just want to apologize again for asking to spot your form in the shower.
Why is everyone judging me for telling the cat a bedtime story?
I'm actually more excited that I had so much sex this weekend that my ovaries hurt
If my vagina was a person it would have a bandage around its head and it's arm in a sling rn
Im so sorry for peeing on your chest.
Laying in bed naked is fun. I now see why guys love boobs... They're sooo bouncy! This long distance relationship is really killing my sex life.
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