Holy shit! This guy had his hands and feet handcuffed and was scooting across the interstate and we almost hit him because it was so dark. I hate Louisiana.
At an apparent methhead hillbilly bar and was smiling for a pic when one toothless wonder screamed "look at all them teeth"!
Did you know nanny-cams work just as well for recording that blow job on the sofa?
It's a Westpoint/Army thing, we talk about Miley Cyrus a lot
Why?
Because when is jailbait ever not funny? Answer: Never
Clothes are such an inconvenience.
We gave a starfish gin and Lucky Charms. I think it enjoyed it. Best trip to the beach ever.
want the rest of his teeth to fall out while he slowly dies alone. Pretty sure I'm to the anger phase.
It is way too early in the summer for me to be coming into work still drunk.
I may hire someone just to sell my family the drugs they keep asking me for. It's cutting into my doing drugs time.
No more jager for that guy. He jacked the neighbor kids big wheel, rode around making jet noises, then passed out behind the wheel and rolled it and broke his wrist
It's always nice when a total stranger hates your ex just as much as you think they should.
i peed in the parking lot at work not even thinking, a woman saw
We went from him going down on me to swapping baby pictures of our moms.
This is a weird combination of planning and sexting but whatever
So now I'm just going to brush my teeth, get high, and go to sleep. Like an adult
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