My boobs are too big for things to be going this downhill in my life.
I know it was you that I fucked last night... I can smell my disappointment all over the sheets
Found out why I didn't have to go drug test. My boss grew pot to pay for grad school.
Say what you want, but those Fraggle Rock DVDs have gotten me laid twice.
I am dressed. And we didn't do anything. He's gorgeous and tall tho. Something nice to look at when I'm hungover
I'm sorry I peed on your everything.
New Halloween costume idea: Frankenstorm. We have three hours. Make it work.
WHY AM I CRAWLING IN OLDER MEN HOLY JESUS
He seems like a super lonely dude. I bet if I gave him a picture of my tits he wouldn't make me turn in this paper.
I want to ride his face like a jet ski
Lost my pants last night. Really need to stop taking shots of whiskey like I'm eating skittles.
oh i see... well this is a positive first step in you courting him for sex.
I'm giving drunk me full control of my body for the next few days. Please don't let me die.
just ran into my father at CVS while buying condoms...he winked at me. I really need to move out of this town.
Replacing my paralegal is easy. Replacing my favorite office fuck toy is a totally different story. Damn him for wanting to better himself instead of being my manwhore
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