in pain and im wearing pink underwear
so?
i dont own pink underwear
Fuck. I have a girl here waiting on me in my room! I told her I was going to get a drink of water... I'm in the bathroom taking a dump... I have mudd butt bad... There's NO toilet paper!!
Any little, cute, petite blondes with you?
Nah, I got some slutty brunettes though.
Next time I say "Watch this" Get me the fuck out of the bar.
I want to apologize but I don't know how. Do I just say "sorry for OD'ing on your couch"? I think that just sounds weird.
you looked at her and told her she looks like the girl you lost your virginity to then told her you wanted to lose it to her again
oh and speaking of men I've slept with. Ryan lost 1/3 of a testicle zip lining
I just haven't been myself lately. I slept with a guy 21 years older than me and I've been wearing my hair in a center part.
He's so drunk he thinks he's the ultimate warrior. Told cops he was from parts unknown. Never broke character
In the pie chart of my life, she is a huge part of why I drink.
40s are totally the cure
I am not a slut. I'm just very open with how much I love to have sex. Stop judging.
Is this like a preordered booty call?
This reminds me of the time you were crying and puking in the toilet at that party while i did shots of tequila in between blow drying your feet. miss you!
No instead we fucked in the elevator.. it was wrong on so many levels..
How tall was the building? Maybe it was only wrong on some of them
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