she cant drink. allergic to alcohol.
ewwww. she might as well have a dick.
i convinced her that her period would come back if we did it doggy style
they almost convinced me to put "Funbags" in the 'other names you may be known as' section of the job application
i feel like this needs to be a 'lose some teeth' kind of weekend.
on a scale of 1 to 'no sex' how busy are you this week?
if you just come over, i will entertain you
arguing about the color of your bong does not count as entertainment
I just put my hair into this ponytail & it looks hideous & really cool at the same time. I am dedicating it to the hangover I have
Exactly. Some of us want to get married. And some of us want to wear sombreros and do cocaine. To each their own.
you can't just say no to brian. he was bugging me to get me to drunk for 14 hours straight yesterday. HE DOESN'T GIVE UP
Idk what was more embarassing, seeing her face when I finished, or seeing her roomates faces thru the door..
Woke up eating a pickle on the bathroom floor this morning in some random guys sweat pants.
just because you have a nice tits it doesn't make you a magic little snowflake.
We got drunk, we had raw sex and we discussed about the showrunner change in Doctor Who, in that order.
Because you put the dick in ridiculously amazing boyfriend. And you deserve to have nice things happen to your penis. That's why.
It's alright. I'm just trying to make her realize you're not good enough for her.
Randomize
