dude, she has braces
i meant the dude w the ponytail.
i was less creeped out when i thought you were talking about the 14 y.o.
I just watched a girl use a tall boy Coors as a rolling pin to make christmas cookies
Do you think if Santa was real that he's have a big penis?
When you wake up, I have rum and am in town
I just walked in on my roommates playing baseball with old vegetables and a bigass knife.
She pulled out a handful of chest hair. And then gave the room a Brave Heartesque speech.
Is it a good time to tell him he's getting too clingy if he sent me a picture of my name spelled with Cheerios?
Serious question: Should I volunteer to get tazered? My instincts say no but my wild side says yes.
pretty sure tht was the guy who once went to the club dressed as waldo. he still looks weirdly fuckable.
I feel like weed makes my smarter. I'm watching the stocks and the way I understand if, do not invest in Yahoo right now because they are not fit for that.
We had sex on a lawn chair while fireworks were going off last night. It was unavoidable that I got mosquito bites all over my ass
She wore her engagement ring the whole time we fucked. I hate her fiancee, so it was cool
all i want is a guy to go down on me while i eat peanutbutter from a jar
Do you think my laundromat will notice that the bloodstain on my sheets is in the shape of a face?
I just made deviled eggs for everyone not passed out. Im officially becoming a drunk chef.
Randomize
