no but I have been chillin' like em' homeboys in the rainforest yo!
all adderall does is make me the grand champion of using wikipedia.
He came in my eye, I lost my earring and all of his friends saw me topless. Happy New Year to you as well.
We got kicked out after you decided to chase your shot using the soda gun behind the bar.
You just kept yelling, "THAT'S THE POWER OF PINESOL, BABY!"
I'm on a no morals kick. That'll be 3 girls in 24 hours....ending 2011 with a bang
Just sucked a bong hit straight from my girlfriends mouth & pretended I was a Dementor. Life just 87% more like HP.
It might have taken me 30 minutes but I finally finished the toast I made. That hungover.
im going to hold it over his head for all of eternity. when his children are born i am going to go to the hospital as his wife is giving birth and shove the picture in the childs face, so the first time they see their father is in a drunken stupor looking like a jackass.
Cory and I accidentally had a sexual adventure last night.
How do you ACCIDENTALLY have a sexual adventure?
I'm pretty sure the Jahovah's witness only came to our door because the front says "Twerk Or Treat"
It's like I'm getting a welcome home parade with sex!
...Just this whole adulting thing gets in the way of mermaid drag shows at lesbian bars.
OMG I DIDNT READ THAT TEXT CAREFULLY CAUSE I'M ON THE DEVILS LETTUCE & I THREATENED TO PUNCH A CHILD OMG I'M SO SORRY
A reply to my tweet is getting more likes than mine, the disrespect is real
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