I told him I was pregnant. Figured it would soften the blow of telling him I had herpes.
Did it?
Not as such, no.
ashley and jimmy are about to have sex on degrassi.... EVERYONES GETTING LAID BUT ME
my roommate and her friend got reaallllly high last night and it looks like they played scrabble. one of their words is "nippal"
Just got my cast off. My occupational therapist wants me to self-gratify. My clit is about to have an awesome weekend...
they arrested me when i was peaking, i'm pretty sure they were specifically looking for me but i was too busy rolling around, loving the grass to notice the police car..
think they'd let him outta jail for my wedding? we could have him back by like midnight....
you should have walked with me to my car. you just missed a girl rip off her bra and throw it into a dumpster and scream mardi gras
Ok- my dad's ex-wife's Irish nephew. Weird if we fuck or not?
whoa! who said he's my boyfriend?
Oops. Sorry. That guy you keep accidentally running into in public. And at home. And with your vagina.
Thanks for putting up with my drunk friend last night. Its all fun and games till someone pukes macaroni under your fridge.
Have you ever eaten pizza and gotten your dick sucked at the same time? Because I have pizza.
I said I hate kids.This dude said he will sell his children to go on a date with me.
Nobody's dick fell into my mouth tonight
Same encounter she body slammed me to the floor and than humped me
I can't control his boners. I can only encourage them.
Randomize
