There are 3 speedbumps now up. Think you can manage the urge to piss on them?
Aw shit! That's like putting me a in a room full of Captiain Crunch Donuts and Jasper Hale and not letting me put my mouth on either.
why dont you just whore around college until someone loves you...thats how it works for girls isnt it?
I've decided that my new worst fear is that I'll end up on "I Didn't Know I was Pregnant"
I was hidding Easter eggs in CHURCH this morning when one of the older men came up to me and said "I always knew you'd be a bunny just not the Easter kind" ... Our congregation obviously has high hopes for their pastor's daighter
I just found puke in my bra..
guess who's eating a vending machine cheese danish, has no panties on, and is still the classiest bitch at this bus stop?
He thought he was drowning because he was drinking water and intentionally holding his breath. Dear god what did you get me in to.
Oh and now he's calling me Brohammed Ali.
I don't think he knows what shame means anymore. He gave some bar slut his sisters Tiffanys necklace, in exchange for anal.
I can't wait for paintbang. I'm going to throw a marker at a child. There will be bail money in my backpack in m trunk. Don't use it on beer.
The 4th is next week. If we don't get to a new level of high, we will be letting down George Washington.
I can still be you friend and be there for you. And sometimes get drunk and fuck you.
I have already put on my inside pants.
Seriously, why do I have a mortar round?
I am become drunk, destroyer of all worlds
Dick is dick. I’m not turning it down because he’s younger than me. Covid has been a real cockblock and I’m a woman with needs
Randomize
