Do you reaalllllly want to put "porn editor" on your resume?
Tell mom and/or dad that I am going to be home late. I am really blazed. Don't tell them that part, though.
I don't know who he was, where he came from, or where he went, but he just handed me a bowl of mac and cheese and left. It was good too.
I felt kinda bad after screaming 'ITS MY BIRTHDAY TOO' while he was having a seizure in the front of the party bus.
She had her underwear around her neck. No one can tell me i'm a slut now.
Seriously, I want to give you a plaque thanking you for your dedicated service to my vagina.
it went ok. then he slept in a parking lot and took me out for a picnic the next day. boys are confusing.
There was a group of girls next to us. One was smiling at me. I only remember walking up and saying "oh you're Russian". Not sure where it went from there
Ok, so technically yes she wore a red tank top to the stoplight party. But under it was a yellow bra and green panties.
There's some band that practices next door to my apartment. I'm thinking we may need to check that out. I could be like, "Hey boys, thought you might like some lemonade and vagina."
My arrest report says I was found in midtown "performing lewd and lascivious acts on top of art meant for public display and enjoyment".
I'm going to get old and fat one day... probably pretty soon and I'm not going to have any pictures to show to my cats of what I once looked like.
So he noticed that I cut a half inch off of my hair. Guess who just earned himself some road head on the way to the twin cities?
I wonder if Paul and Andy realize how lucky that they are that we're too lazy to start fucking other dudes so we just stick with them
You smoked too much and passed out, didn't you?
You know me so well.
Randomize
