Moan for me like Helen Keller
I'm about two and a half drinks away from gay.
I'm coming over.
Judging by his buldge, this guy is huge. just paid steve to follow him into the bathroom and find out. They had a convo about it.
i swear to god. if they dont have practically DTF written on their foreheads, or a glowstick in their hands, strictly no entry.
Well last time he got out of rehab he lasted 6 hours. So 3 days this time is quite an accomplishment.
My liver and I thought we knew what we signed up for. We were wrong.
I feel like passing out with my foot on your face has bonded us at a very fundamental level.
Just found out my rents have been paying my siblings to cockblock me for the past 5 years
Not as covert as you thought huh?
True love: he brought me a margarita while I was n the shower. He's a keeper.
Gay bathhouses. They're actually a thing. So god does exist. And he doesn't hate me as much as you think he does
My very favorite thing in the whole world is when guys try to booty call her as I'm fucking her. Sucks to suck.
Shroomed with my best friend'a dad at his wife's surprise birthday party so you can say I have experience in the field
Tony's mom to him at breakfast: "I found the shirt you wore last night in the bushes this morning."
She's takin more dicks this month than I have in my life by the sounds of it
So I was walking to the bathroom and some random dude threw up while walking towards me. He kept eye contact the entire time and didn't stop moving.
Randomize
