So how was he last night?
Five-minute foot-long.
awww and there was just a proposal on stage with the pussycat dolls !!!!!
Did someone propose they get off the stage?
You give one guy a hand job and suddenly everyone wants to get with you
I just don't understand how my upright asian catholic roommate is getting more than me.
She really thought E.D. was a sexually position.
his teacher called to say he gave a girl on the playground a rock to touch his penis. proudest moment of my fatherhood
On our way there. Drinking my beer out of a coffee pot. Cuz it's my bday
Which I'm also surprisingly fine with. If he walked into the bedroom naked, holding a fish in one hand and a lit candle in the other and said "Let's get fucking weird." I'd probably go with it. He's just that hot.
At this point, if I'm not getting fucked by a man in ONLY cowboy boots, it's not worth it.
It's not even 6 am and I've already told my mom to fuck herself in the face
Between having seen you naked and interpreting your values based on the occasional political FB post, you're no stranger for sure.
I was giving him a handjob in the woods and a family walked by
Two words: blizzard sex
Let's FaceTime each other while we shotgun beers
let your parents know i'm sorry i ran around the house pretending their metal detector was a "booze detector"
Randomize
