yes, too bad my tears were being wiped away by tits in my face
I am so fucking pissed, there are no Shamwows in the As Seen on TV Store.
Looks like you'll have to stick to jizzing in socks.
Just found my car keys in your throw-up.
HOnestly. That's my one goal for this whole trip. I don't give a shit about souvenirs or sand. I want penis.
would he be offended if i told him that "national coming out day" is october 11. thats subtle enough right?
Well, there goes the no drunk sex injuries resolution.
Struggs. It's also 90 degrees out but I'm not sure I can feel heat or cold any more. Too hungover.
I just threw up every bad decision and it hurts
please, i've had weekends with less dignity than this.
She needs sedatives and a leash
WHY WONT HOT GETMAN MAKR PUPR WITH ME!!!!???!?!!
I'm gone to the point of literally hugging trees, partially for support, but also because I like them.
Getting drunk at 9 am is not a super power.
I wore the clothes I got arrested in last night to work today.....there is no where but up from here!
It feels like heartburn in my lungs. I'll buy 2 pounds.
Randomize
