Also, I'm sitting at a crosswalk watching two Mexican gangs fight each other. I miss you too. A lot.
and the mascot is a pinecone. its really no surprise that people here dont get laid
I woke up with the wrong plaid-shirted guy in my bed.
Just proved I could salsa dance in a bar where no one was dancing
Sidenote...no idea how to salsa
I wish i could just live off of margaritas and good sex.
not even kidding I just received the single most greatest head I have ever had.. It was unreal. It was like stick my dick into a silk bag of puppy ears.
Also I'm at the pub and there are old lady pirates gyrating on a pole. I wish you were here.
I just want my kids to know I fucked some really hot dudes before their father.
You're going to scar your kids
Fuck you and your fucking taquito's.
I will be the DD but everyone has to call me Mistress
This town is a penis wasteland. I haven't seen a suitable penis in months. This is becoming an emergency situation. I need penis in my life
He texted me "sup", so I sent him that gif of the surprised guy and apparently it offended him
Dont ask questions just say words. where can i find plan b?
i bet he makes cat noises to excite himself.
I was so drunk I asked my mom if she had always been my mom or if it was someone else for a while
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