Sign #1 this conference will suck: Ice breaker question, how many proud virgins do we have in the room, overwhelming response. Looks like I'm not getting laid this weekend.
I was so high I couldn't tell if they were goosebumps or herpes.
i was like a deer caught in headlights with its coke-dick hanging out
I just gave my patient permission to swallow while pregnant. She was so embarrassed to ask...but her bf was really happy with the answer.
At this point I feel like i'm never going to be sober, and it's frightening
I gave him head while he watched NASCAR. My future flashed before my eyes.
Just got a blow job while taking my online quiz. How is life in the dorms treating you?
Please acknowledge the sock on the door. If not it will be rammed up your ass.
"If it gets you high just do it" I told him he was the Nike of drug abuse
I just finished packing for spring break, took me 4 minutes. To be fair though I only put my trunks, a pair of underwear, and 50 condoms in my bag.
I talk a lot when I drink rum. he was going down on me and i was telling him how i wished i could tap dance. oh god
No. We can't get pedicures until my toenails grow back.
Cause I know you wanna ride the D like a Vespa in ROMAN HOLIDAY
The guy who said he's gonna suck your butthole till your face caves in is at Maggie's
I just found two ugly toothless rednecks fucking in the woods in my backyard. The man shouted at me close the door your letting the stank out which made no sense to me cuz we where outside. Whatever. just another Monday in the Northwoods.
Randomize
