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ok, stay where you are, be there soon
I got so drunk I pissed the bed last night. He still likes me. He's a keeper
He is a keeper. You on the other hand are not.
Getting up at 8 this morning to drink could be the best and the worst idea we've ever had
you were licking his little sister's watercolors and trying to paint with your tongue.
I wish Denzel Washington would coach my flip cup team..
i don't think my life will be extraordinarily more meaningful if i let him put his tongue in my butthole.
Had a student tell me he misses the old Four Loko. He's in 7th grade. No one is allowed to claim I started drinking too young ever again.
Does saving a line for myself for the morning so I don't seem hungover at work count as responsibility?
Adult decisions.
her best friend is in town and she told me that they used to fool around when they were drunk and I'd have to "help keep that from happening"
you motherfucker
What is soo wrong about a house of half-naked people hugging each other and laughing?
The pinata full of drugs?
Have you seen our bachelor? He's MIA. Last seen being led to some hookers by Kanye look-a-like.
she keeps dunkaroos and gatorade in her bed. yep pretty sure im in love.
This is the drunkest I've ever been at a chili's
My apartment is also really close to an alcohol rehab in case I get out of hand
the D I S R E S P E C T of sending someone nudes, them opening it, and not bothering to respond
Randomize
