the crunchwrap supreme is the def leppard of the taco bell menu
which is why it's clearly superior
I woke up with a picture of my dick as my background. still wondering if it was a good night or not.
Ask him about the girl he took home Saturday night. I swear she voted for Kennedy.
well... just scaled a wall and entered the bar through the balcony. just making some last minute memories nbd.
I guess he was telling a totally normal story about being a lifeguard and I wouldn't stop screaming "THAT'S LUDICROUS" at random intervals.
so gross sitting on a warm chair at a restaurant..you just know a fat person was sitting there shoveling food into their face for hours.
The things i do for you...I put all those condoms on a bed, complete with girl, and you sleep in the bathroom
You may want to re-read your sent texts from last night. You were texting me about your "fire shits" spelled 6 different ways between 3 and 5:30 AM.
Drinking Patron always ends with me puking or receiving anal. So make your move when I start ordering it.
People will say "JOE YOU MUST TURN DOWN" and I will refuse, in the name of liberty.
If you hear a loud thud and smell ozone, I may have been electrocuted.
Getting a blow job while breaking up with my gf helps cope with the pain... Kinda weird her best friend is giving me the BJ
Testing the emergency boobs hotline
he was peeing off the deck shouting "urinals are for pussies" that's how much hurricane.
I just bought condoms and a potted plant, making for a top ten super weird and awkward purchase.
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