if you don't start talking to me i'm gonna tell your gf that you said she tastes bad
i'm pissing behind 7/11. if you guys leave... i'll think it's funny too
Everyone just saw your hickey on TV and on the jumbotron at the hockey game.
Thanks dad.
She left me with blue balls so I jerked off on her french toast in the morning.
I just ran from Santa Claus in Kroger
HER PREGGO ASS BROUGHT SPEGHETTI-O'S... IN HER PURSE.
i don't know where i am. i made bad decisions. i think this guy is dead.
he said he has something really important to tell me but isn't ready yet. It's either that he loves me or has herpes
They really brought out their best strippers for vday weekend
Too many sundays start with me waking up still drunk in my car.
yea. Don't mess. He will heal me. But my blowjobs will be historical.
He peed off the roof and then we bonded it was beautiful
He just felt my tits to find out which piercing I lost.
My cat just smacked my blunt from my hand and then put her head in my hand. I don't know how to feel
I think I achieved my goal of being high for 24 hours in the same week I promised myself I wouldn't smoke anymore
Randomize
