I just saw fred flintstone in my fruity pebbles!
what drugs are you on?
none, cept for the pain medication i got prescribed by the doc: it said 2 pills every 3 hours, but I took 6 cuz i'll be away from home later
You know me. im down for anything that could harm my well being. lets dress like dolphins so everyone will see what dicks they are.
the cops were hovering over him then shinned a flashlight to the floor above ours, then I realized that some fucker jumped from the third story.
fuck our hall.
Am I really that girl who walks around half naked wearing a cowboy hat begging for liquor at some random guys house
Is it bad that i wanna bang this girl ONLY because she looks like my cousin?
I just made SCOTCHSICLES. no further info is necessary
What part of "he tried to put his dick in my ear" did you not understand??
It was less of a bar, and more of an abandoned basement that some people sell booze in.
No, seriously, I've slept with 3 guys this month.
It's ok, February is a short month
On my way to get pizza I followed a dog into Salvation Army where I was just hired
I'm pretty sure I imagined the dog... They still hired me
You can wear anything you want
So... Naked it is then
So why exactly are your shoes in my freezer?
You know that thing where you wouldn't typically eat ass but you're in love with him so you want to eat his ass, because it's HIS ass
Taking a shot every time the Russian in COD says vodka... BEST drinking game ever.
I was trying not to blow up your phone, but I'm so horny I think I might die
Randomize
