When we made out her lip\nose ring fell out in my mouth. Awkward?
Just saw a girl in a wheelchair puke then rally. Diversity matters.
I just made a friends list on fb of all the guys ive hooked up with. genius.
I asked about his 3 inch scar on his chest. It's from when he had to castrate a bull on the estancia. Apparently this is how good bull meat is made.
he was shitfaced drunk and couldn't walk but could still recite the top 10 in order from the first season of american idol. impressive
thankjk goddddn taco bell uis open htis lateee!
you do know it's eleven in the afternoon, right?
she blew me in the men's room in the restaurant. it was a french bistro, so it was okay
I JUST MET THE GIANT MAN THAT WILL CARRY ME FROM PLACE TO PLACE
I'll be thirty in eight months. I think my goal is too stop changing my pants in the parking lot at work by then.
Someone stole a lamp last night.
I get off at 11. but they've been letting me go early cuz I've been crying a lot
I apparently tried to wax off my nipples.This explains the pain
It shouldn't be this hard to find someone who you haven't blown.
We found him. He just came running out of the closet with a bruise on his face saying he has been fighting elves in Narnia for a year.
I think every girl deserves a pregnancy scare. Because then it just feels like such a priviledge to be bleeding out of the vagina.
I legit just did a jig towards my box of tampons.
Randomize
