i only hope i can top last weeks sext session
I'm gonna do things to you that will make the neighbors want to move.
she took her clothes off and my dick went from =====> to =>
i should do something illegal before my birthday. as of thursday im old enough to go to jail.
I swear they were about to hook up!!
I know because I was in the tub taking an imaginary silent bath. They stopped cuz I gagged on my shot.
I may have to steal the boat sober, but I feel that would be harder to explain.
Oh you know same old same old. just eating pizza after faking extreme night terrors to get a one night stand to leave my apartment
Apparently after I threw up I put my socks in the toilet......
It's the happiest looking penis I've ever seen. It should have a top hat and a spectacle on and soft shoe across the room with a cane. He's a cheery little feller.
Her text was so long it had an arrow to expand it. You know it's bad when even your iPhone can't handle her
he sneezed into my face mid-kiss
Bless his heart
I dunno what's worse, that one guy here said he'd blow somebody for Tim Horton's right now, or that someone else looks like they want to test his sincerity.
Come get me, I'm fucking scared.
I've made a new rule for socializing in the winter: if it doesn't involve me orgasming or getting drunk I can't make it
the sex got boring after the first three hours
holy shit
you had her IN YOUR BED NO PANTS AND YOU GAVE HER THW BOOT?!?!?!
Stage five clinger bro. had to go.
Randomize
