I walked up to her and said hello and wanted to ask her if she had fun last night... she asked me if we had met before.
Yep, it's a dick on our front door. Intentional?
So he says he needs "alone time" a day that he doesnt have to deal with anyone. should i be concerned?
I think in guy language thats " Im fucking someone else and dont want u catching me"
if i see another status about New Moon, i'm gonna punch a baby
So he handed us the weed then asked us if we needed any papers. And she goes "i dont know what that means, do we need to sign something?"
I flashed some kids doing a church car wash. I feel like I really improved the quality of their lives.
If I get laid dressed as one of the McPoyle twins, I deserve all the medals.
Then again, he has huge mansions.
*manboobs.
We had sex on roll out bean bag chair, and then proceeded to sleep with a blanket with dolphins on it. Happy birthday to me.
Finding an empty bathroom to shit on campus is like the quest for the fucking Holy Grail. Except with more stench and humiliation.
Fyi, shaking your genitals at me doesn't count as "trying to have sex".
I wouldn't call us friends exactly. Honestly I just hang out with him so I can hit on his girlfriend. They won't last long, and I'll be there to pick up the scraps
let’s face it, me joining a co-ed soccer league is like, 33% motivated by my crotch seeking a healthy outlet
I'm smoking and watching the Muppets Treasure Island. Where are you?
Something about that statement reminds me just how much of a role model you are, sis.
Wanted to let you know I hooked up with your brother.
i thought he was gay wtf
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