she left her pants. im pretty sure she grabbed mine on accident. im like 9 man sizes bigger than her. wtf
The best part was her genuine shock and total "I didn't know" look when we said she couldn't cook a steak in a microwave.
i am officially better prepared for a hangover tomorrow than i was for christmas.
come over i need a lifeguard for my shower
So I realized I'm not completely sober when the automatic toilet flushed and I screamed
We can't bring brittanys dog so we are getting high and getting in my bathtub I think it's pretty safe
Makin mac and cheese without you. Definitely seem to do this better inside you. Splashed boiling water on my cock
All I remember is running out of the bathroom with one shoe on and the other in my hand. Pretty sure I was yelling as well.
There is a visibable outline from you in the grass. its you in the fetal position...
Yeah Greg found him eating out of a tuna can with a pill cap
If a vagina could give out awards, you should be preparing an acceptance speech.
cant tell, his cock is acting like one of those inflatable arm waving things outside the market
my memory may be fuzzy, but the 20+ naked pictures I sent him were surprising clear
Currently putting together my outfit for this weekend, AKA a poster board that says "I'll cook you breakfast and do all your laundry, take me home." On front and back
idk wtf was in that bud but I was talking to my dead dog last night bro holy shit
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