Luol and I just scored with two 40 year old married chicks. They dropped us off on the way to soccer prctic. The kids in the back were confused. Call me.
you know whats weird about having a girlfriend....I look forward to masturbating now....sort of like quality me time.
Between the two of us weve fucked every guy at this table
Her breakfeast in bed consisted of half a pop tart that I didn't want, and water that I slipped birth control into... Who says chivalry is dead?
come on don't hate me. your brother looks just like you its almost a complement that i had sex with him.
He gave her the shocker .. I didn't know people really did that.
I was holding her hair back and when she quit puking she told me she's been saving her scissor virginity for me.
She's the hottest girl I've ever seen before and didn't lose her virginity until she was 19. As men, I take it as failure on our part that hot 19 year old virgins still exist.
He just yelled in the bar, "So I stuck it in two girls butts, why are you bringing that up now?"
while i was sleeping he changed my screen saver to his dick with a heart frame around it. I just might be falling in love.
he asked me to lick his asshole and I told him his girlfriend could do that for him
Its alot like that time you got motorboated by the carni at the rodeo.
My boss doesn't know what jello shots are. I've lost faith in this company.
What do you mean? Just eat his food and have sex with him. Unless you want a relationship, then just eat his food.
His hair is as curly as mine. It was like watching me go down on myself.
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