THEY JUST PLAYED KISS FROM A ROSE TONIGHT IS PERFECT
He seems like he has feelings, which is completely unacceptable; esp for a boy in college.
i just googled "who won the civil war" . how can i still have a 97% in this class?
I just found out that AAA will pick you up if you're drunk for free if you're a member. How did I not know about this?
Because its an amazing idea and you're the only one I can think of that will allow a pirate threesome
You know, I had the money for a pregnancy test, but at the time, tacos were more important.
You know me. Don't need roses, just dick and food.
I woke up with my earring stuck inbetween my tits. Somehow you fucked my earring out and my boobs saved it. I'm pretty impressed with both of us right now.
If I remember correctly I tried to steal a mail truck last night
I just remember lots of butts and something about ranch dressing.
I'm pretty sure his cum gave me swimmer's ear.
oh, i solved that problem. i told him i wanted to steal my roommate's nephew. radio silence. haven't heard from him since.
I agree with that homeless guy though, you do need a haircut
She couldn't find her toothbrush so I had to wait while she sucked on the 12 peppermints she found under the couch. Pretty resourceful for her level of intoxication.
Because of you I can never eat chicken nuggets without thinking of you fucking him. I hope youre happy. I really do.
Randomize
