Is it weird that I have contacts who i've classified as DO NOT ANSWER?
Lol no its called college
I'm a 23 year old virgin. I've masturbated in ways you can't even imagine.
All she said to me last night is that when her eyes roll back, to release my choke hold.
His cuteness will no longer contol my vagina
Look, the fact that I didn't kick him out and rip your clothes off speaks very highly of me.
Will it be a clothes optional week when I get there? I have an amazing outfit of tattoos and toenail polish planned.
I had to run home with my hands covering my tits this morning. How does this keep happening?
I feel violated by Miley Cirrus's performance in the VMA's.
If you need anything just hit me up
Pancakes
Noted.
Crying while listening to Miley Cyrus. BE GLAD YOU JUMPED THIS SINKING SHIP!
also I have no idea whose underpants I'm wearing right now but they're super comfy and I'm not giving them back ever
Im eating leftover Easter ham in a bubble bath. What has my life come to?
I just tripped over a but plug that was on the floor. It's 430 in the morning
I wish I was taller so I could give these boobs the publicity they deserve.
No instead we fucked in the elevator.. it was wrong on so many levels..
How tall was the building? Maybe it was only wrong on some of them
Randomize
