Greg found me on xtube. Who knew random hook ups would leave their web cams on and upload it. At least it shows off big penis.
His text read: Sex? I replied: Not drunk enough. He bought 4 more rounds and tantalized me with the offer pizza later. This could be the beginning of a beautiful relationship.
the pizza man had no reaction when jackie and me opened the door naked, i guess he's used to that shit
i just realized i put more money and effort into 420 then i did for christmas
NExt question... Do i wanna sleep under my palm tree
YES.
Judging that there's a photo of me getting head while sitting on a graveyard tombstone.....not good.
She alternated between blowing me and feeding me bites of the sandwich she made for me.
I put the condom across her upper lip. It was like a mustache of a job well done.
I hope your fat roommate breaks the bunkbed and crushes you in your sleep
For sure shouldn't do homework after beers and joints. Just cited like 3 sentences at the end with (History, 2013)
There's some band that practices next door to my apartment. I'm thinking we may need to check that out. I could be like, "Hey boys, thought you might like some lemonade and vagina."
I'm kinda surprised he wouldn't be honored to take me back as a fuck buddy.
just woke up on the floor of my shower...it was still runnning
I might go bald with this hair pulling thing every night.
Sarah just give sum homeless dude a lap dance, took like 2$ worth of change from his cup and was all like, "Biiitch, this aint free"..
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