Cool, I just put that together. I didn't know if using a tie-died sub machinegun was too crazy
We did lines off of a Whitney Houston CD case. That makes everything okay.
We're gonna go drive around campus and throw water balloons at all the drunk bitches wobbling around, wanna come?
mate, my mother watched me threw up out of my nose wearing only a g-string.
A reason for us to be drunk all week National Singles Week
I had very briefly met him a few years ago. My friend was tired of hearing us both complain about being horny. She figured she would fuck two birds with one stone.
I'm concerned that this blind man on the bus has a boner right now
my drivers license is super glued to my shoulder and im to hung over to get it off come and help me
Last time we had an ultimatum like that, things went very far south. I'm down, but it's your turn to wake up in a hospital.
why does CNN give a flying $@*# about the royal baby so, so much?
i hope they name him Joffrey
I'm 99% sure I just flashed my dad with my vagina. So that's the new low now.
First date was awkward. I think I just saw someone die.
Yess he was literally so drunk that like at one point I'm pretty sure he thought it was hard and in when neither were true :/ haha
I'm just concerned as to why his penis is two different colors.
I think it’s appropriate to celebrate the start of mother’s day at the bar with the men that almost made me a mother
Randomize
