Ok seriously, can we bring back badminton?
she was a 2....and a legitimate 2. like, helen keller is a 1, this girl...2.
I have now ridden the bus with a ninja, a samurai and Jesus. Who says the bus is for losers.
we are learning about oedipus in english. fuck you for making this awkward for me
i preemptively threaten to cock slap your kids if they are snobby yuppy bitches
how the fuck is Katelyn 5'1" and 85 lbs and she tackled a bouncer to the ground?
He told me about how he pissed his pants last weekend like it was a normal part of conversation. Within 10 minutes I was going home with him. I think he put me under some kind of spell.
Fuck you for setting me up with the guy from the Nickelback cover band
Payback for not stopping me from fucking the guy in the wookie costume
After my second liter of German beer, nothing D-cup or larger is safe near me.
When God made him he put all his talent in his dick. What he lacks in brain, he makes up for in loin.
He went in for a kiss so I shook his hand instead.
Getting high with your mom, but thinking of you!
If by fun you mean, did I meet her cousin for the.first time and bang him, then yes it was a productive evening.
We could just stay sober.
No! We tried that once.
It sucked.
I peed in my closet, which at the time looked like a sparkly bathroom...
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