the sex was like sticking it in a jar of mayonnaise
Do you think Patty Mayonase ever went down on Doug?
how can i change my meal plan to a keystone plan?
how many times in life can you be kicked out of a pizza buffet for vomiting on the food and insulting small children
is the shake weight an appropriate valentine's day present?
Is there a zoo near here? I need to see some penguins like right now..
I am not bailing you of of jail
its not you its me. and by that i mean i am more interested in having random one night stands with random hot girls then having the same normal sex with u.
its kind of scaring me that i am turned on by tom cruise in rock of ages
Taking shots of gin by myself out of TMNT glasses and chasing with bites of chocolate cake. AMERICA.
Because her vagina is one of those illusive black holes that leads to a parallel universe where he is king and the sea is made of beer! That is why they are together!
I found my hair extensions. They were in my hamper.
I hugged the bouncer as we left.
Have you ever just woke up in the morning and felt pregnant
When she saw "buy condoms" on my to do list she figured out pretty quick we were breaking up.
I'm having a funeral for my vibrator. Please be there. I need your dick for support.
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