oh and i really hope miley falls off this mountain she is climbing
"Tonight I'm turning swine flu into an std" this might be how zombies come about. Peace civilization.
she thought the capital of kansas was topanga.
Just got the orientation leader spot. For the first two days, I will be one of the best looking guys on campus. The freshman girls will be so disappointed they settled for me when everyone else comes back.
Dude. My sister is off limits. Touch her again and I'll rip off your dick and force feed it to you.
I accept this challenge.
The size of her vagina has nothing to do with the size of her heart bro
ive been a drunken mess for the last 5 days. i feel like a 19 year old again
Today I left one job interview, showed up randomly at his house for a midday bootycall then left right after to attend my second job interview. I got both jobs
Less than a month to go... I do not understand how I was able to put up with a roommate who wears bright green Crocs for a year.
I am on my usual post-jerkoff high of eternal happiness. Like I could punch a fucking tiger.
Did we seriously steal a wet floor sign from McDonald's then get chased down by a homeless man for it? Never drinking again.
I knew my sister shouldn't have gone to the bacherlotte party. Two of the other brides maids have black eyes and my fiancé called me and asked if this is the crazy she's marrying
I fucked your neighbor. Welcome to the new apartment!
You are a genius and a whore.
im on a boat
How did you get this number?
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