were talking about masturbation in my pysc class. He says it's healthy. I'm gonna live forever
We are the drunkest people in Toys R' Us right now
I will never try to masturbate with americas funniest home videos playing in the background ever again
Questioning the dried heart shaped nutella on my boobs. Valentines day has begun.
He tried to stick it in and I asked him what he wanted to name our child and he quit.
The waitress just told me I'm asking alot. So far I've asked for a soul, an angel and carbombs
Time flies when you're blacked out in a lake
I NEED YOU HERE TO KNOCK THE MALT BEVERAGES OUT OF MY MOUTH
WAIT DID YOU MAIL ME A KITTEN
I bet Billy Ray Cyrus wishes he had pulled out now....
But in today's society it's frowned upon not to wear pants in public.
My ladyscape is the envy of many and the shangrila of few. I will display it proudly.
You'll pass into the great gay beyond
Where it rains cosmopolitans and scantily clad gogo dancers of all genders direct traffic
I found more straws in my beard this morning. Please stop doing that.
I think I ejaculated my soul out.
(440): please tell me you didn't have sex in my dress.. IT'S A VIRGIN DRESS.
Randomize
