What started out as a threesome has become me sitting here watching them have sex... Can I get a ride home?
she fell down the flight of stairs and was fine until she saw the two broken beer bottles on the ground by her.
thats a woman
I shouldn't have had sex with her. I feel that I may have opened a pandora's vagina
she was sobbing drunk in the backseat about her dead cat and how the guy in the front seat didn't want to hook up with her
judging by her collection of mens sweaters, shes fucked the entire lands end catalog.
I just put bacon on a thin mint and enjoyed the shit out of it. I better not be fucking pregnant.
I deleted his number so I had to go into my old voicemails which are saved through my gmail and search his name... Never underestimate the resourcefulness of a drunk girl on a mission for dick
My head is pounding and I need an ice pack for my vag. Successful friendsgiving!
The bond between me and cheese is something no man can understand.
These bubbles make my penis feel like it is resting on clouds.
She just walked up to him and was like "you should fuck Angela" and it worked! She is the ultimate wingman
Just came so hard my back cracked. Other women are totally missing out if they don't masturbate.
Also barcrawl friday. You ARE wearing a tiara
I just read my D.A.R.E. essay from 5th grade. I'm having mixed feelings about my previous life choices right now.
Just woke up beside some twink in a kilt.. how is your sunday going
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