ur plase or mine? lol
well if you don't learn how to spell, you may be at your place and I'll be at mine.
I'm drinking in the hospital parking lot.
I'll hook up with guys I don't even like, as long as they leave early enough the next day.
i pretended i was deaf and got a girl to come home with me
He wants me to have his first child. So that makes four gay men that've called dibs on my eggs.
If his smile makes you freak out and drop things imagine what his penis could do
I'm considering having a threesome with my friend just so I can sleep with his boyfriend and not feel guilty about it.
Why did you load my phone up with pics of Al Gore?
I have invented a new game to play on campus. It's called "Mormons or Pledges?" It's fantastic.
Come over. Bring cocaine. And my t shirt with the dolphin on it.
Bring me your tired, your weary, your buffalo chicken dip
Nothing says "i love you" more than flowers and potatoes
I threw up in the bathtub last night like a decent human being.
woke up on my floor using my jeans i wore out as a pillow
haha i wouldn't expect any less of you
21st birthday weekend in Vegas has concluded and all I'm missing is my underwear and 'Contacts' icon on my phone home screen.
Randomize