I need to find out who his wife is so I can fuck her before he gets to mine.
I don't know what your problem is but seriously you're a cunt for throwing up that song on your page. It's rude as fuck
omg its myspace i didnt think anyone took that seriously anymore
I just wiped my vajayjay with snow. Bad idea.
you came in and threw goldfish on our blue carpet and screamed SWIM BITCHES and then made me drink a best friends potion with you
How does me getting a new dildo make you crave olive garden
She passed out in his mom's bed and when we went to go get her she went 'no its cool I live here'.
Even her dad came up for the body shots. Wasn't sure what to do so I just laid there and let it happen...
Gosh I haven't been pantsless in front of anyone for a while. It's time for me to pick up my game. We need a party. I need some rum.
Just realized how sopa could affect my ability to watch porn, son of a bitch
He went down on me while I had rollers in my hair. I've never felt more like a lady.
I'm not asking you to commit. I'm politely asking your penis to be my friend.
In other news my cocaine dealer got arrested for heaving some kid out of a fourth story window.
You was so high that you insisted that you heard someone whistle, then you insisted they was trapped in the wall!
Please tell me that all of the things I remember doing last night didn't really happen. Please.
Btw...refried beans is a terrible thing to throw up.
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