she called me screaming that i shouldn't ignore her phone calls, because she's not trying to get me to hang out with her and she doesn't want to be my girlfriend, she just wants sex.
what did you do?
i asked her out. that's so hot.
He passed out so we kept throwing water on him, he got excited and asked if we were at the wave pool.
is it bad i banged a 25yr kindergarten teacher last night?
No thats like a top 10
id pay someone 5 dollars to tell me whos house im at right now. comfy couch though
get to allyx's house asap
Ok is everything ok
Yeah, theres just lesbians
omg yes on my way
We FINALLY fucked. I swear that's the longest I've ever held out for
Umm you met him three days ago....
I said what I said
She was humming during sex. After I asked her why, she said it was her sex theme music
I made a bet with her that she would show me her tits if I finished my beer. Only on spring break.
Member that time when we got super drunk and had fun and fell in love
I remember it like it was tomorrow.
How bad would it be if I wore out the dress we got peed on in. You're the only one who knows.
Haha its fine we ask know it. He's still cool thought
Focus on the keyboard man. Focusssss
It was awful. He had a wife
And now you've had a year of virgin penance. Absolve yourself.
I can get there in 20, one question, Drress Code? Stripper Lite (make up may require an additional 5-10 minutes), Suggestive Professor (professor Kamil's cleavage ain't got nothing on me), Daywear, Dyke (and trust me you ain't seen dyke), or Exactly What I'm Wearing Right Now. (all of the above may arrive under a coat and are subject to my level of sobriety. Which is currently like nonexistent).--xoxo you know you love me, Gossip Girl.
He said it wasn't ladylike of me to drink more whiskey than him. I told him to stop being a little bitch.
leads to pukin, then cryin, then 24hr masturbatin binge, then cryin again and finally a combination of all 3
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