You're my little dorito
I'm sitting at the gyno watching cnn in the waiting room
Everyone is walking funny when they come out, ugh I'm not looking forward to this
im pretty sure i tried to attack the vending machine last night
lol who won
well im in the hospital right now so u tell me
I'm saving my limes so I'll know how many drinks I've had.
I do the same thing, but I use ice cubes.
Just soaked up some whiskey with a paper towel and then squeezed it into a cup for consumption. New low.
i couldnt tell she was wearing a bumpit until she started giving me head
Getting pregnant off pre-cum is like getting high off erasers
The kid taped his penis down so that he wouldn't get a boner while dancing with girls. Oh these middle school man whores never cease to amaze me.
Dude, somewhere around here makes 4loko slushies. I just decided coming home isn't so bad.
Still burping lighter fluid. Totally awful.
Just a smidgen more estrogen and shed be golden
She's got a legit dose of dude going on
No kidding. All she needs is a cheek full of chewing tobacco and I'd have fucked John wayne.
Would I waste your time for mediocre porn?
While we were having sex he asked me if I wanted to get wingstop after. I think I found my future husband.
I slept awesome next to you. You're like an electric blanket that I can have morning sex with.
Apparently walking into a national conference and proclaiming "i'm here to fuck shit up" is frowned upon.
Who knew?
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