Ugh I just know that when I take off his pants his underwear will have Megan's Law written all over them.
Update: no underwear. Greeeeen light.
This bar is like a mediocre whore house....but free
The last thing I remember is pushing my way into the bathroom and dumping a 40 on him. We havent talked since.
I hope he didn't notice that my shirt was inside out when I told him I didn't have sex with the guy. Kind of a dead giveaway.
drinking from the bathtub cause I'm too lazy to walk downstairs and too thirsty to care
One guy got his nose broke and was playing with it. Then another guy was playing beer pong off his horse.
Doc gave me something stronger than Xanax. The pills have your last name imprinted on them. This cannot be coincidence.
Oh you have the munchies, Dad? That's great and congratulations on the weed but STOP EATING MY APPLE PIE
Usually I just ask myself "have I been naked here?" If the answer is no I correct the situation.
Sheila knows I only go down on her on Bastille Day. Valentine's Day we get high and watch The Neverending Story. THE SYSTEM WORKS.
I mean I know I'll get over it by like tonight but ew ew eww. I cannot. Dude I don't even know his name also I threw up on his penis
Aka I'm headed to the liquor store because I don't know how to handle my emotions.
Do you really want to know anything about the inner machinations of a furry's mind
Don't do tequila. The Devil himself spits into shot glasses and we call it tequila. You will do bad things.
Haha word. Sure I can do that. Help me find which bar has my pants and you'll get free tacos all week
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